A note to Leah, age 17-18

A note from my 25 year old self to my 17-18 year old self.

Dear Leah,

Wow, if only you knew what the next 8 years would be like!  Right around now I suppose you are just finding out you are pregnant.  Don't be scared, this is going to end up being one of the best days of your life.  Don't worry about how little money you and Ben have, life has a way of working itself out, even if you have no idea how it will.

You won't always have no money.  Money comes and goes.  Work hard!  Try your best and everything will work out!

I guess I should also mention that this whole pregnancy thing is gonna be kinda hard, but totally worth it.  You are going to get a phone call one day that will make you wonder if your baby is ok.  Don't worry, he is, God will always take care of him.

Right before your baby is born life is gonna throw you and Ben a curve ball, but you will make it though.  You have friends and family that love you a lot.  Life will not always be this hard.  

About a year after your baby is born you will finally have your own place to call home again and God is going to take Ben's new job and run with it.  You will see month after month and year after year God provide for your family through this job that God gave him.

Oh, and speaking of Ben, Ben is going to become a better father and husband every year that you are together.  Ben is always going to be on your side, love you when you are unloveable and take care of you.  He will also work hard to become your son's (yes, you are having a son :) ) best friend.  He actually manages to be more amazing 8 years from now than he is right now.

Since I have let the cat out of the bag that your first baby will be a little boy I might as well tell you a little bit about what he is going to be like.  He is going to be beautiful, he is going to be little when he arrives but that will quickly change.  As he turns One, Two and then Three be PATIENT with him.  When he is going through the terrible twos just love him through it.  After he turns Three, Four, Five and then Six he will turn into one of the most caring wonderful little boys you will ever meet.  He will teach you so much about love and strength that you will thank God every day, day and night for him.

Well, I guess here is the part when I will tell you a little bit about how you will turn out.  Over the next few year you will struggle with depression and have days that you feel like you are "not on speaking terms with God".  God is going to love you through those times.  His love for you will always far out weigh your selfishness and lack of understanding.  

There are things you will be good at and things you won't be good at.  You will learn that the hard worker you have always been needs to be kept busy!  Being a Mom will be your favorite job but you will also start and run a successful business that God puts in front of you.  

I know, some days I can't believe what God has done either.

As you get older you will get a little bit better about how quickly you get angry and you will get a lot better in the whole patience department.  It is still a work in progress but you will get there.

Oh!  I should also mention that you and Ben will decide to try to adopt through foster care!  I know you won't believe me about that now, but in a few years you will understand.  God will show you, like He always does.

In the mist of all these years there will be some pain mixed in there.  Through that pain you will get to see the goodness of God first hand.  You will see Him perform miracles in both your family & Ben's.  Even when things seem hopeless know that He is still there, taking wonderful care of the people you love.

If I could only tell you 1 thing that is true about what the future holds it would be this:

  God will always take care of you.  Good care of you.

Behave yourself  :)

Sincerely,

Leah Wentzel