Tuesday, March 31, 2009
Monday, March 30, 2009
Saturday, March 28, 2009
Friday, March 27, 2009
December 22, 2008
I talked to Shannon from Alternatives about Buddy. I asked her how soon she thought Buddy would be taken out of Sherry’s home-she said she was surprised he hadn’t been already. That broke my heart, especially after talking to Sherry this morning and her expressing a concern about exactly that. I also asked Shannon what she thought the chances were of Buddy being placed with us. Basically she said if no relatives decide to take him we actually have a good shot of having him placed with us, especially because we would adopt him. We need very badly to get this all rolling. I wish that I had had all this finished months ago-but I know God can do the impossible.
Sherry called me this morning and told me she thought I need to call Buddy’s social worker Deb myself so I got off the phone and called her immediately. I did not reach her but I left a detailed message.
Sherry also told me that Roseanne, the relative that would take Buddy when he is taken from Sherry, mentioned that she too might know a family who would want him. Sherry didn’t seem to believe her.
December 30, 2008
Tonight Sherry had a HUGE dinner at her house. By huge I mean it seems she invited everyone they know. I only went for one reason-time with Buddy. Since Sherry had asked me to consider taking Buddy I have almost been avoiding him. I don’t want to get attached, I don’t want to feel sad over something that never was, I don’t want to worry about things I can’t change. But, regardless, life is not about me, so I have to do what is best for Buddy and if we do get him, being used to me would be best.
At first when I walked into Sherry’s house I didn’t think I would see him at all-there was just TOO much going on, but after chatting with a few ladies from church I wondered down stair to find Kobe and found him playing with Buddy. So, I sat at a table with some familiar faces from church and watched. I watched Kobe run from Buddy in this circle around the basement while Buddy chased him with a horse headed stick. I watched Kobe laugh so hard and Buddy smile so big and play so hard. He’s gorgeous. He’s so little. He’s not mine.
So, as the kids played I saw a boy Kobe’s age making Buddy cry by taking his toys from him and of course I had to stick up for him. When you are a mom your motherly instincts do not always keep their mouth shut.
Eventually Sherry pulled Buddy upstairs to eat dinner and with the house so full of people I told Kobe it was time to go. As I walked upstairs to get our coats off Sherry’s bed I heard crying. I walked past Buddy’s bedroom and heard him in bed crying. I stopped at the door, knowing that he was probably in there for a reason, I only paused for a second and then lightly touched the door and said a little prayer for God to take care of Buddy in ways we can’t. Then I walked down stairs.
On the way home God and I had a little chat. At first I was struggling to find the right words, the right request to bring before the God that knows what is best for Buddy. I found myself not able to even ask God to let Buddy come live with us. I then tried out praying in a more general, that Buddy would end up in a good family. That didn’t fit either. As I struggled to say and feel what was right, I finally landed at “Not our will but thine be done.” The only words that fit. The only words that are truly my hearts desire. The ones that if we hold to give us hope for a future that will bring us the right ending.
Oh Lord, you know our hearts, not our will, but Thine be done.
January 19, 2009
Yesterday at church Sherry told me that Buddy is being moved on Friday. Today is Monday. He is going to be living with the relative that has wanted him all along if Sherry & her husband did not adopt him.
I didn’t cry when Sherry told me. I knew if I did she would. I didn’t want to do that to her.
After I was done talking to her I gave Buddy a hug. I hate to even admit it to myself because it makes me sad but I know I could be a good mommy to him. I know that I could love him the same way I love Kobe. I know that he would have a good life with us. And I hate that we might not have a chance to give that to him. But then I go back to trusting God and knowing that where ever God puts Buddy, God will have his hand on Him. God cares about him more than the rest of us ever could and He know, He knows.
So here is what I do know that would lead me to believe there is a tiny chance he still may end up with us.
The lady he is going to live with is close to 60 years old. 3 year olds are demanding, enough said.
She has 3 months to go through and become a licensed foster parent. I hope she doesn’t do it. Just being honest.
Even if she tries to get licensed I don’t know that she will get approved, which is kinda what I am hoping for.
So, with that said I am hoping for a miracle. A real one.
To be continued....
Wednesday, March 25, 2009
Mom: Eat all you food and clean up your room
yup-that is all I say ;)
What makes your mom/dad sad?
Mom: If I tell a lie and I do bad stuff
By the time I asked Kobe this question about Ben he was a little slap happy-can you tell?
What makes your mom/dad Happy?
Mom: If I tell the truth and if I get good grades.
Can you tell I emphasize truth around here? I was NOT a fan of the lying stage!
What makes your mom/dad Laugh?
Mom: Tell jokes and tickle her
Kobe doesn't tell jokes so I don't know where that came from :)
What was your mom/dad like as a child?
Mom: Chicken pox
Dad: He liked basketball, he, ummm looked like a teenager?
Apparently I am defined by the fact that I had chicken pox while I was little :)
How old is you mom/dad?
I love love love that Kobe added the 1/2 to Ben's age-too funny!
How tall is your mom/dad?
Mom: About 6 feet? 4 feet 9?
Apparently Kobe doesn't have much of a concept of height :)
What is mom/dad's favorite thing to do?
Mom: Play with me and clean up my room
Dad: Play basket ball
You should have SEEN the devious smile on that child's face when he added "and clean my room" as part of what I like to do!
What does mom/dad do when your not around?
Mom: Cleans up and goes to the store
Dad: Goes and buy a new watch
Ben and I both cracked up when Kobe said this about Ben buying watches!
What is mom/dad really good at?
Mom: Driving a car
Apparently Kobe doesn't remember my car accident-the only car accident he has ever been in.
What is mom/dad not good at?
Mom: Riding a bike
Kobe has never seen me ride a bike OR seen Ben play football.
What is mom/dad's Job?
Mom: Makes videos
Right on the money :)
What is mom/dad's favorite food?
Kobe was right about the salad, but burritos for Ben?
What makes you proud of your mom/dad?
Mom: If she gets a thousand bucks. Or two hundered.
lol, about "if she gets a thousand bucks"-where do I get that?
If your mom/dad was a Cartoon character who would they be?
Mom: Mickey Mouse
Can you tell we have been talking about Disney a lot!?? He also thought it was HILarious to say Dad was Patrick!
What do you and mom/dad do together?
Mom: Go places
Dad: Play video games, play basketball
How are you the same as mom/dad?
Mom: we both have a bedroom
Dad: our same faces, because were both white, long eye lashes & teeth
Apparently we have a lot in common?
What is Different about you and mom/dad?
Mom: Our hair
Dad: Our eyes
Right to the point.
How do you know mom/dad love you?
Mom: Because she has jesus in her heart and when she buy me toys
Dad: He tells me
I was wondering who was going to get credited with the "when they buy me toys" answer, I guess that's me!
What is mom/dad's favorite place to go?
Sophia's is a restarant that we used to go to about a year ago all the time. We haven't been there in quite a while now, but since he mentioned it....
|1.||an effect or extraordinary event in the physical world that surpasses all known human or natural powers and is ascribed to a supernatural cause.|
|2.||such an effect or event manifesting or considered as a work of God.|
|3.||a wonder; marvel.|
|4.||a wonderful or surpassing example of some quality: a miracle of modern acoustics.|
Tuesday, March 24, 2009
My cousin Lauren found out she is having a GIRL today! First niece on my side of the family, oh how spoiled she will be!
***My Grandma is doing great considering. She is still at the hospital and they say she will stay a day or two more. They are dissipating the blood clot with medicine and are looking into why she got it in the first place. Thank you for all your prayers! Please continue to pray for a FULL recovery!***