"God gives us dreams a size too big so that we can grow into them."

Wednesday, August 4, 2010

Matthew 5:44

"But I say unto you, Love your enemies, bless them that curse you, do good to them that hate you, and pray for them which despitefully use you"

I have NEVER needed this verse.

And then I became a foster mom.

As I mentioned a day or 2 ago, I was seriously ready to throw in the towel. I'm not kidding. Sometimes it is JUST TO MUCH.

I shouldn't take it personally that a person WHO HAS HAD THEIR CHILD TAKEN AWAY BY CPS is talking about me and my family badly behind my back. Or that they are trying to blame things that go on AT THEIR HOUSE on us. We should expect people THAT ARE NOT USEFUL MEMBERS OF SOCIETY to try to blame everyone around them for their own problems, and unfortunately, "all around them" includes us now.

I think it is who they try to say stuff about that bothers me though. It is one thing for them to say stuff about me but about my family...have you met me? I will tear your hair out for that!!!!

In Foster Parent Training Classes they tell you, it isn't "if" you get investigated, it is "when". I should mention here that WE are NOT getting investigated for anything, we have not been accused of anything nor has anyone even hinted that anyone is trying to accuse us of anything.

Unfortunately, I am acquaintances with one of S's mom's closest friends. She is a psycho just like S's mom. Anyway, she was reading me some texts that S's mom sent her talking about a situation they were accused of that they say never happened and then said maybe it happened at our house, in the text she said this.

Now, these two women are crazy. I can't even convey how crazy except to say they seriously belong on Jerry Springer. So, them texting each other AFTER EVERY SOCIAL WORKER WHO KNOWS S'S MOM HAS TOLD HER TO STOP HAVING ANY COMMUNICATION WITH THIS FRIEND is ridiculous to start with and they only text each other to fight and spy and threaten each other. So, S's mom saying crap about our family to her crazy friend doesn't mean ANYTHING but it still drives me nuts. I want to go break her little texting fingers shut her mouth for her you know?

Anyway, here I am NEEDING this verse more that I EVER have and I have to say this goes against every human emotion I have.

But it helps.

Knowing God wants me to be nice to these people helps me to not feel like a retard that lets people use me all the time. I don't let it get to the point of them being able to affect my life in a negative way or my family's, but I will still do it - most of the time :)

*I would just like to applaud myself on the use of the following words all in one blog post:





and the use of bodily harm innuendos:




I think all of this makes me sound SUPER classy.


Rebekah said...

Real classy :).

aka. Mimi said...

Don't worry about it... The post I'm working on right now says something along the lines of wanting to bring back public floggings and wiping boogers on briefcases. I think the terms "hair-pulling," "teeth-clenching," and "insane" are in there too... All within the first two sentences! If that's not Jerry Springer-ish, I don't know what is! :-) You're not alone! Gotta love life in Foster Care Land! :)

Kelli said...

I chuckled because I have never said anything like that, haha! You are human, cut yourself a break.

Goodness and Mercy Mom said...

Bless your heart!!! Matt. 5:44 is hard to digest when you are dealing with a situation like yours.

Your post from Monday was beautiful. You are right. You can't quit. Your children are worth it. Praise God they have you in their lives.

Go ahead and vent, and grieve, and cry. Then leave it all at the foot of the cross.

Praying for you,

spng7 said...

Sending you a hug .... sounds like you need one. We all love you and support you in what you are doing. The kids are worth it and you are wonderful with them .... it shows in all the smiles we get from them.

Leah Wentzel said...

yes, it is just venting. :) and this is after I have calmed down! Ugggghhhh.

Apparently I have been called to grow a MUCH thicker skin and have the patients of Mother Theresa herself (I assume even she had her bad days).

Thanks for the support and kind words, they do make a difference :)